K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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