Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
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