How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize