do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
