We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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