i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
