Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
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Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
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Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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