I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
