You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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