My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
