Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
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