Define "chronic" masturbator.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
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