UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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