there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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