Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I AM VODKA MAN
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
