Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
