Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
