Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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