I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
