STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
