Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
