i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
smell my finger.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize