You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Randomize
