so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
