I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
