yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Redeem this text for a blowjob
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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