I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
