Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
