I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize