Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
