he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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