I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Randomize
