I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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