party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
