tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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