When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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