Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize
