I just pynch a tree in the face
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
