I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
