I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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