Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to put some appletini on your dick
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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