YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize