He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you inspire me to be a worse person
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize