she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
