we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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