Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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