he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize