My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
