After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Boobs speak an international language.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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