Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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