ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
